No Place to Call My Home

Living in a world of multitudes,
Yet feeling as if I live in this world all alone.
It is written that Christ had no place to lay his head.
It is as if I have no place to call my home.

Chameleons within this world do abound:
Changing their colors wherever they go.
Appearing here and Disappearing there.
Imprisoned by their Insecurities, their Traditions, and their Fears.
Seeing the chameleon's reflection when they look into the mirror.

Being Emancipated, Having my Freedom, Being at Liberty.
Using my poetry, my books, and my music to protect me.
My search must continue – my journey must go on.
If only I could discover an idealistic people
– we could change the world –
Maybe then I could feel comfortable in calling this world my home.



cvd '09

Unhappy Fists

Words that killed the silence of the night:
"Get your ass out here! You f_ _ king punk –
You're going to learn!"
Then came the fire – Unhappy fists that would leave
A black and blue burn.

The sound of fear ... The sound of tears
A young woman's life now a living hell.
All from a dad who believes life's lessons
Are taught by marking the body and making it swell.



Haiku

the sky: stars so scarce
few dreams being born tonight
what a depressed world


another full moon
the world appears enlightened
will there ever be peace?

cvd '09

72 hours of silent questions

on top of the green mushroom hedge, uncertainty lay prostrate

from within the nearby field, miller's gopher allows one eye to peek

a male goldfinch snuggles inside red dawn cover

the neighbor in apartment c looks both ways, then cracks open another beer

eastside sunbathers are instantly on high alert

a mother again screams bloody expletives

claws ripped through the children's flesh

the police photographer is now visible, framing the evidentiary

it's 3 a.m.: two hours past 12 noon

cvd '09

That Which Never Ends

Amaranthine:
Eternal, Everlasting
Ceaseless, Never-ending

Eternal are the seasons that speak to us
Out of the depths of their existence:
Reinvigoration, passion, transformation, silence;
Their return is forever inescapable.

Everlasting is the mountain that possesses the livelihood
Of freedom.
Being as emancipated as the wind …
To live each day with no care for tomorrow.

Ceaseless are the stars that bring life to the
Cosmos beyond.
Giving light in exchange for darkness.
Experiencing liberty at each moment in time.

Never-ending is the search for tranquility of mind.
Listen to the rain. Absorb the sun's Enlightenment.
Observe the tree. Grasp the solitude of snow.
Discover peace within the discovered.

Never-ending, Ceaseless
Everlasting, Eternal
Amaranthine



Haiku
Crickets ... Butterflies
Sounding imprisoned ... Flying free
Having free will

cvd '09

Wandering Spirits

Wandering spirits
Drifting through time
Searching ... Searching ... Searching

Where are they looking for?
Will they ever find.
Searching ... Searching ... Searching

In the South they have been:
Where is not There.
Searching ... Searching ... Searching

Back to the West
And then to the East.
Searching ... Searching ... Searching

They just cannot find.
Where is not Here or There.
Searching ... Searching ... Searching

Northward they go.
Eagles are seen soaring overhead.
Searching ... Searching ... Searching

This too is not Where.
Timeless they continue
Searching ... Searching ... Searching

cvd '09

Senseless Aggression

At War: Pregnant teen.
Unfriendly Fire: Oppressive parent.
The Battleground: The Mind.
Weapons: Words and Actions of Destruction.
Independence versus Tyranny.

The Oppressor fires:
You're a slut, a whore –
You can’t live here anymore!
The Oppressor fires:
Retarded your child will be –
Your values are a disgrace to me!
The Oppressor fires:
You wanted to play –
Now you're going to have to pay!
The Oppressor's attacks are relentless.
Day in and Day out –
Each shot packed with mean-spirited powder.
Hoping Independence will come under submission.

No retreat! No surrender!
The pregnant teen surrounded by unfriendly fire.
Her Siblings: Double agents they spitefully play.
At times Independence grows weary … Her mind shouts in pain:
Will this never end? Or will I go insane?
Freedom Doggedly Refuses a Death Sentence.

The baby is born healthy and strong.
A peace agreement does not yet exist.
The oppressor is camouflaged with lip service love.
Independence cannot and is not deceived.
Her baby's love will not be bought.
With his Independent mother is where his allegiance is to be.

The child will grow to know what Independence and Freedom know so well
-- All Wars Are Hell –-

cvd '09

from freedom to slavery

eyes consumed with sparkling
wonder
eyes that spoke to emerging
hope
a spirit experiencing a life of
liberation

eyes again peering through the
violent oppression
as if incarcerated in dante’s
loneliness
eyes with dreams that are
imprisoned
a soul again
shackled

cvd '09

The Reflection in the Mirror

Piercing eyes staring back at her.
Eyes belonging to the one whose reflection
Could be seen in the mirror.
Standing there was a beautiful young woman:
So insecure, so filled with fear.

She has made a multitude of promises.
Promises made to others, Promises made to self.
To break the one major promise she said
Would allow her to be called,
"The biggest hypocrite to have ever lived –
The biggest hypocrite of all."
Desperately wanting to change. Reaching out for help.
Hating the person she saw in the mirror.
Living with a tormented mind and now also an
Emotionless heart ... self-destructing.
Self-destructing in front of her very own eyes.

To have become dependent. To have become helpless.
Unsure of surviving on her own ... fearing change.
Allowing the slow death of her destruction to continue
To take its course.
Always hurting herself more than the hurt she caused others.

Reneging on almost as many vows as the promises she made.
Betraying others--Betraying herself.
Believing that new environments will bring about her change.

Understanding, though, as she looks into the mirror:
She can never leave her problems behind –
She can never run away
From the reflection in the mirror.

cvd '09